“What it feels like for a girl using online personals”

No, I haven’t been cross-dressing, and no. I’m not going to talk about a Madonna song. What I’m talking about is to imagine what it feels like to be a girl on an online personals site.

Let’s face it, attractive women are what drive online personals. They get you to signup, to create a profile, and to email them. Now take any popular online personals site, and any decent looking woman on there is probably BOMBARDED with a blizzard of emails. (If you’ve done the recon profile experiment I teach, I’m sure you know exactly what I’m talking about.)

Unfortunately, most of the messages she gets are from men who just don’t fit what she’s looking for. I’m talking about guys who are either outside her local area, guys who come off VERY CREEPY, and guys who have verbal diarrhea.

LET’S TURN THE TABLES FOR A SECOND…

Imagine What it feel like to be a girl on an online personals site

How about I turn the tables for a second. Picture this:

Suppose you were getting HUNDREDS of emails EVERY day…

… From women who live in Russia.

… From women who have 9 kids.

… And from women who looked like they weighed 450 pounds (on a good day.)

AFTER A FEW DAYS OF THIS, WHAT WOULD YOU DO? Do you think you MIGHT be a little frustrated?

Do you think you would wonder if these women actually READ your profile?

Do you think you would start deleting them?

Sure.

And on some days, when you’re not in the mood to deal with this, you start MASS DELETING emails. One after another… Good, bad, it makes no difference.

This is a typical situation most women find themselves in the moment they post their online personals ad.

Is there any wonder why YOUR email never got responded to?

LET ME SAVE YOU THE TIME, HERE’S WHY SHE DIDN’T REPLY.

1.) Maybe she’s already met 3 guys who beat you to the punch, and wants to see how things pan out. Early bird gets the worm.

2.) Maybe she read your email, but your photos and profile were missing a few CRITICAL things, and she didn’t reply. (hint: it’s much more than just a photo)

3.) Maybe she has specific criteria for what she’s looking for, (some women when getting a large volume of emails get EVEN MORE selective with whom they reply to.)

SO, WHAT ARE YOU DOING WRONG?

If you think you should compliment her, and tell her all the reasons why she should reply, you’re actually conveying all the reasons why she SHOULDN’T. When you compliment a woman you give her higher value, Higher value than you, and what happens is you are in effect looking up to her. Knowing this now, is there any wonder she didn’t write back? The next time you’re thinking of complimenting a woman and when you tell her how hot she is, consider this:

Compliments = ZERO Challenge

Challenge = Confidence

Confidence = Interest

You’d never walk up to a woman in a bar and tell her she’s hot, seems nice and you want to buy her a drink, would you?

No.

So why on earth would you write a first email which conveys the same thing?

GIVE WOMEN A CHALLENGE

Women tell me all the time they’re dying for a guy to stand up and be DIFFERENT.

Here’s some tips to help you:

1) K.I.S.S.

Keep it simple. People are busy these days and the last thing someone wants to read is a 5-page email containing everything about you.

2) BE DIFFERENT

After getting HUNDREDS of emails, don’t you think she can spot something thats been sent over and over. Once you understand what she’s dealing with, its easier to send her something different than every other guy.

3) Compliments = Needy.

If you’re emailing women complimenting them, you’re probably coming off the OPPOSITE as you think you are. When you compliment a woman via email, (something every OTHER guy does) you’re conveying that you’re a NEEDY guy.

4) LOOK FOR CLUES

Dig through her profile to find that one thing you find interesting about her, and let her know about it.

5) DO THE OPPOSITE

Try this experiment for a week. Try sending women the OPPOSITE of what you think you should send. Don’t worry about the end result. You might be surprised with the results. If you think she’s got a killer figure, mention something about her weight. If you were laughing after reading her profile, mention something about her profile being kind of boring.

6) CTA – Does it contain a STRONG call to action?

If you don’t hear back from women you email, you can’t take it personally, it’s the nature of the internet. … And thats why you should ALWAYS follow up with another specific “Follow up” email if you didn’t hear back from a woman you’ve already emailed.

I cover this technique in detail (along with a specific template you can use) in the Insider Internet Dating program.

Yes, there are specific things to improve your odds, but If you are worried about women not responding it almost becomes a self fulfilling prophesy and as a result you end up CONVEYING to you don’t have a lot of options. Start focusing on the women who DO reply to you.

SOMETHING TO THINK ABOUT …

Suppose you were speaking to 5 women this week, had 2 dates this week, and were seeing 2 women. Do you think you’d be concerned about a woman not replying to your email? Nope… I didn’t think so.

By the way, if you haven’t had a chance to try the Insider Internet Dating program yet, take advantage of my 45-day trial so you can see for yourself how EASY it is to meet women online.

http://www.insiderinternetdating.com/for-a-girl.html

Heck, I’ll even give you some extra free gifts just for trying it out. And if for some reason you still want to go back to your old destructive and expensive ways, you can still keep the gift. My treat.
… Or you can ‘wing it’ on guesswork and hope for the best… but I hope you take my advice instead. 🙂

Your friend,

Dave M.
Author, Insider Internet Dating

David Deangelo on Meeting Women Online

This is where you need to be to learn about how to really stand out in the online dating world. After you have signed up for a couple online dating sites – now what, right?

Well here you will learn some fantastic online dating tips from the masters. Learn what to do to write your profile that will make it stand out among the thousands of other online profiles. Learn how to craft an email to a woman you want to meet. Learn how to respond to her emails. Learn what to say and more importantly sometimes, what not to say to spark attraction in an online environment that is devoid of body language cues.

More online dating tips will be coming weekly, so keep checking back as the library grows. For an immediate crash course in meeting women online, check out Scot McKay’s program featurring David DeAngelo (and many others) David Deangelo’s program dedicated solely to meeting women online and online dating tips.

Here is a quick article for you to read:

There are a lot of new venues coming out that can be used to meet women online.  Myspace was popular for a while, but then the spammers started hitting it and all the commercial crap – and pretty soon Myspace became a feeding frenzy – and meeting women online became a LOT harder.

But then Facebook came along – and did a MUCH better job of keeping out the internet mongers.   Thus it has become a reliable venue for meeting women online and can really breathe some life back into your dating life.  The thing is – you gotta know HOW to market yourself on Facebook so you don’t look like some jackass from Myspace who just got a new playground.

Here are four simple steps you can follow to begin to open the floodgates.

STEP 1: Connect with the guys – and other women – who have a lot of cute girl friends.  You have to be circumspect at the beginning, or you really could accused of spamming and kicked out.  So root out the people who have big networks – and become their friends.  Remember – in this case – friends FIRST!

Next – start trying to connect with the women you are interested in a very roundabout manner.  Send them a friend request with a message.  Now, if you send a message that says, “Hey baby you are HOT – wanna hook up?”  She is going to kick you right in your cyber-nuts and block you.  Instead – find something about her that you have in common, and find a person that you are both friends with.  Instead, say something like “Hey I saw you on Michael’s friend list and I noticed that you love to read too.  Have you ever read The Death Gate Cycle by Margaret Weiss and Tracy Hickman?”  Make sure it’s a question, too, so she feels compelled to answer you.

STEP 3: Start using the tools that Facebook offers.  If you are meeting women online, you have got to at least use the Group tool.  If you want to start doing that – check out the group “Carlos Xuma’s Alpha Lifestyle” – it is a totally cool way to get together with other MEN and discuss the latest dating tips for men on the internet.

Anyway – create a group that is something that women would like too.  Ok– so no Fantasy Baseball League Group.  Instead try something about maybe coffee or cooking, fitness, the latest reality show or local venues.  Something a woman can get into.  Then – invite her to your group!

The last step is where you really start getting into the good stuff.  Here is where you begin to take your Group offline – have a party at a local bar, or set up a group outing.  THIS is where you can start really meeting the women.  Have a wine appreciation group?  Go to wine tasting.  Have a gourmet food group?  Check out a new restaurant.  Get the drift, Kimosabe?

Ok – so this is some pretty basic stuff, but it can really liven up your dating life.  If you want to REALLY learn some tips and tricks for meeting women online, check out Scot McKay’s program on Meeting Women Online called Online Dating Domination, featuring David DeAngelo and many others!

Or – if you want to read some REALLY cool dating tips for men by Carlos Xuma (mentioned above – and you can actually hook up with him on Facebook.  Talk about a NETWORK!) check out his Dating Black Book of dating tips.

Do you know what the second biggest complaint from women is about online dating?

It’s that each and every man they see seems like every other man they see!

They all do the same things, say the same things, list the same things, IM the same things, and in the end, seem like the same guy. And this applies no matter what you look like, what you wear, what you drive, or what you do for a living.

To millions of these beautiful women online who get net attention, we’re all just an Army of Dilberts, living in our online dating cubicles, trying to get by. Isn’t that how you sometimes feel when you’re writing your profile, or sending an email? I used to.

Well, it’s time to DEFECT!

You need to ABSOLUTELY STAND OUT. How to capture her attention and build it, step by step until she can’t get enough of learning about you? You need to be the guy who’s got a way of speaking, and of hearing her.

And you’ve got to start with your profile. Guys make all sorts of mistakes when writing their own profiles. Stupid mistakes. I call them Blunders because they are so incredibly easy to detect and avoid, but they get made every day by most men anyway. But some of these blunders are repeated over and over again, sinking most guys like rusty battleships.

Women read these profiles and assess who you are by what you write. If you write like an idiot, they’ll think you’re an idiot. So here’s what to look out for. Read this list — it’s the bare minimum you need to rise over — then go check you’re your own profile.

1) Don’t misspell
Dude, use your spell-check, stick your file in Word and spell-check it. Are you a computer idiot? Use a dictionary. Women hate it when men misspell. It shows sloppiness, an inattention to detail. And women like attention to detail – just consider their predilection for oh, decoration and foreplay. Get it? The two words I see misspelled most often – “independent” and “definitely”.

2) Avoid clichés
You are not a “hopeless romantic”, a “gentleman and a scholar”, or “a boy next door”. Please! It’s been done.

3) Avoid general, generic language
You don’t like walks on the beach, a nice wine with dinner, feel comfortable in jeans and t shirt. Dude – go read some guy sites and see how often men write the same thing. They are clueless. More importantly, to an attractive woman online, they are the same as all the other… invisible.

4) Be precise in your language
Say “Chicago Blues” – which is better than “blues”. “Shiraz” is better than “wine”. (no Chardonnay (feminine), no Merlot (lazy)). The Palms is better than Vegas. Ribeye steak is better than mere steak. Azure is better than blue. Aspen grove is better than forest. The more precisely you can paint the environment of your life, the more tactilely and sensually her imagination will project her into it.

5) Be dynamic in your language
That means active verbs. Verbs that pack power, action, movement. Avoid static words like “is” “are” and “have” – those are static verbs. Use dynamic verbs – USE A THESAURUS to make your sentences sizzle.

6) Show, Don’t Tell
Possibly the most important writing rule of all. Don’t list. Don’t talk about. Don’t tell about yourself. Show yourself. If you’re funny, don’t say you’re funny – be funny. If you love your little nephew don’t (cliché) say he’s the “light of my life” – paint a picture of something you and he do together or how he makes you laugh. This is the difference between George Clooney coming on screen and telling you the story of Ocean’s 11, and George Clooney in the action of it. Which is more interesting? Show your life, don’t describe it. Write little movie scenes in your profile. She will be drawn into that movie.

Got it? Now, there are lots more specific techniques to increase mystery, ignite desire, and incite to action. And to truly stand out online, you’ll need to master those, too.

Don’t waste your time dating online if you aren’t going to make the effort to do it right.

= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =
Grant Adams is author of the wildly effective
“DAO System Manual: How to Stand Out Online So That By The
Time You Meet, She’s Already Yours”
Learn more at http://www.DeepAttractionOnline.com
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Do you ever wish someone could just tell you exactly what photos work BEST in your profile?

…you’re in luck because I’m going to reveal the single MOST IMPORTANT thing you need to know about what photos you should NEVER put in your profile…

From the moment I started experimenting with my profile, one of the biggest tests I conducted was figuring out WHICH photos work best (and I quickly learned which ones were the worst as well).

This is a pretty CONTROVERSIAL topic when it comes to meeting women online.

Some guys say one thing, other guys say the exact opposite, but almost every guy who writes me has the same question:

WHAT PHOTOS DO WORK BEST IN YOUR PROFILE?

Let me dispel some common myths about photos in your profile…

I can tell you beyond a shadow of a doubt that there ARE specific photos which WILL increase the responses you get to both your personals ad, and your emails…

… and there are specific photos which will beyond a shadow of a doubt DECREASE the response to both your personals ad and your emails.

Today I’m going to talk about the photo you NEVER want in your online dating profile.

This was one of the many lessons I learned over the course of the 4 years I was experimenting with online dating.

Now before you go say ‘But Dave, Does it matter that I’m NOT really great looking?’

No. It doesn’t.

In fact, average looking guys tend to do even BETTER than the really good looking guys.

Before you shake your head, hear me out…

The reason good looking guys are at a
disadvantage is because women can see these guys coming A MILE AWAY!

Their defenses go up.

Women automatically think
Good looking = Player

This may or may not be the case, but this is what women tell me they automatically think.

The average looking guy on the other-hand doesn’t raise any ‘alarms’ so he’s got the element of surprise. Her guard is down.

One thing to keep in mind…

I’ve had as many as 40 something profiles up at any one time, spread out all over the country.

I used other guys photos, other guys profiles, mixed them up and posted them in another state. (I later took this same concept and invented ‘the recon profile’ idea you heard me talk about on the DYD programs)

To top it off, I was sending over 100 emails PER MONTH/per account.

When you’re able to send out close to 5,000 emails a month, you start to see PATTERNS.

What’s working and whats not working… from a broad range of ages, locations, and looks.

By doing this I was able to collect a lot of DATA.

Something everyone else *doesn’t* have.

(Who’s going to send out 5,000 emails a month for years?)

What I teach you comes based on collecting and analyzing that data.

————————————————–————————————————–

It’s one thing to talk about something that SHOULD work, however its another thing entirely to say, here..

‘I tried it, these are the results, and this is EXACTLY how to make it work.’

… And that’s where I come up with the concepts contained in Insider Internet
Dating.

Back to the photos.

One of the experiments I did was testing what photos worked best and which ones didn’t.

I tested this out for months, and the results were quite interesting…

One night I was sitting at Starbucks staring at my laptop. I look up and see some 20 yr old kid looking at some bodybuilding magazine.

I think it was Muscle & Fitness.

Bingo. The lightblub goes off.

I’m thinking: ‘Chicks usually like guys who are in shape and are good looking.’

I searched for a bit, and uploaded a few photos on the profiles… but these were photos of dudes without any shirts on.

As I’m uploading these photos, I’m thinking ‘Dave, the women on this website are going to go NUTS when they see these photos, my inbox is going to get flooded.’

I sat there waiting for my inbox to explode with new emails.

And I sat there…

And sat there…

And nothing happened.

So I started sending emails out. This was the same template I was sending before from other accounts and I was getting replies from it.

I figured, hey, if it worked good before, then with these photos I should be getting EVEN MORE replies.

Unfortunately, I got even LESS than I’d normally get. (Which had me stumped, or I just had a pretty interesting discovery.)

Anyways, I looked at the numbers, did a little bit of math (i.e. calculator), and sure enough all the emails I sent out from the profiles with guys who had no shirt on ALL got a lower response.

But something interesting happened.

The profile views were higher than normal, but the emails I got were significantly less than normal.

SO WHAT CAN YOU LEARN FROM THIS?

Simple. If you’ve got any photos with no shirt on, get rid of them.

Not tomorrow, not next week — NOW.

They’re partly the reason why you’re not getting the results you’d like meeting women online.

There’s more.

I could go on and on about all the little things you can do to make your profile work better for you…

For even more tips, and how an average guy like me got 398 dates with attractive women, ALL met online, in 4 years…

To your dating success,

Dave M.
Author, Insider Internet Dating

I’m sitting here at home on my computer and without even leaving my bedroom I was able to find 20 women I was interested in on a couple of dating websites…

So I sent them each an email.

An email that I SLIGHTLY modified for each of them and within 45 minutes… I was sitting with 13 responses.

NOT BAD FOR 5 MINUTES OF ‘WORK’

This wasn’t enough, just because a woman responds to your initial email, doesn’t mean you’re going to be able to get their number.

(although I have an unfair advantage, IID)

What happened after I sent off my ‘phone number’ email?

I got 10 phone numbers WITHIN 2 hours and they’re all *VERY* eager to speak to me.

For some guys, what I just mentioned sounds like something from out of a movie.

It just doesn’t seem real.

I can totally relate because that used to be nothing more than a fantasy for me too!

Now his fantasy is a typical day for me.

It’s not really hard to get a woman to respond and then give you her phone number… IF you understand the PROCESS behind meeting women on the internet.

So exactly what did I send these 20 women that was SO mesmerizing they were compelled to write back?

Simple, but before I get to that let me explain something very relevant and very important.

One of the things I talk about in the program is my ‘templates’. They’re basically email sequences I’ve tested and refined over 4 years.

Sequences for every type of situation you may run across when meeting women online.

And I mean EVERY situation.

I’m talking about scientifically testing these sequences, and constantly refining them over and over until they were SO GOOD women wouldn’t even know you sent something similar to 30 OTHER women as well.

Ok, back to what I sent to these 20 women…

Here’s the sequence I sent them:

STEP 1: INTRODUCTION

Mention something about what you really think about meeting women thru the internet

STEP 2: MENTION SOMETHING FUNNY ABOUT HER PROFILE

Yes, I’m talking about you picking on her. If there’s something she’s wearing, a pose she’s in, the type of photo or something she says bust on her for it!

(this is where the email is customized for each individual women)

STEP 3: TELL HER BRIEFLY ABOUT YOURSELF

Take 1 small sentence and highlight something about yourself. Remember to keep it very BRIEF.

STEP 4: CALL TO ACTION

What do you want her to do after she reads this email?

Tell her what you’d like her to do.

STEP 5: SIGN OFF

This is where you place your name and your email address… make sure you use the right format or it will be filtered out and she won’t see it.

That is what I sent all of them. That’s the EXACT sequence I used… Next week odds are I’ll use a different sequence and perhaps it might work even better than this one.

I’m always trying out new things.

WHAT HAPPENS AFTER SHE RESPONDS?

Just like I show you in the program, I simply copied and pasted my ‘phone number’ email, which asks them for their phone numbers.

Yes, it REALLY is this easy.

That sequence I’ve tested and refined COUNTLESS number of times and its only one of SEVERAL that I have and one of about 8 that I share with you inside the Insider Internet Dating program.

WHAT IF YOU WANT TO CREATE YOUR OWN
TEMPLATE?

Here’s what you’d have to do:

STEP 1. Create an email

STEP 2. Create another version of it only change something in it.

STEP 3. Send both out with SEPARATE headlines so you can keep track of which one gets more responses.

STEP 4. The one that gets more responses you keep, the other? Get rid of it.

STEP 5. Rinse wash repeat. That means just do the same thing over again.

I must tell you…

For your sequence to have anywhere near the effectiveness that mine have, you’re going to have to conduct around 423 tests.

What I mean is you’re going to have to do that whole set of steps I just mentioned 423 DIFFERENT times!

Yes, I know it’s crazy… and I’m nuts for doing it, but I actually conducted around 423 tests that took me over 3 years to do.

I tested ALL kinds of stuff…. from headlines, openers, questions to ask, days of the week to email and a whole lot more.

If you’ve got all that time on your hands, and the energy to do it then by all means go for it.

For most of us, that’s NOT an option.

99% of us don’t have time, we work and turning dating into a scientific experiment isn’t something we consider fun.

ESPECIALLY after a day of listening to your boss, or dealing with customers.

In fact, if I had to do it again, I probably wouldn’t be able to do it… it was THAT much work.

What you now see is the end result of this hard work. (i.e. more results in less time.)

That is what meeting women online is about…
More results, with less effort. Meeting women online the way I do it, is so much fun because you know exactly what you have to do each step of the way and it doesn’t take much time to do.

If you’re reading these emails and saying to yourself ‘I really need to improve what I’m doing’ because you’re NOT getting the results you want with meeting women online then I couldn’t agree with you more.

Getting success with this part of your life doesn’t just ‘Happen’.

Sure you might have some good experiences here and there because you were either speaking to the right girl at the right time or got a girl that was more needy than you were…

But consistent success with meeting women online is the result of knowing EXACTLY what do do each step of the way and then being able to do it.

Its about learning the exact SEQUENCE.

I have the most amazing education system for meeting women off the internet that will teach you just that.

I’ve never published the material you find in Insider Internet Dating. It’s never been part of any course or seminar talk I’ve ever done. No one knows about it except for my own students.

You won’t find it anywhere.

Any guy can use it, it will work on any dating site and it will help you put your dating on AUTOPILOT.