One crucial dating tip – and quite possibly the best piece of dating advice that I have ever gotten is knowing the difference between guys who “GET IT” and guys who don’t. The guys who get it, and really get it, are the ones walking out of the bars and clubs every night with a hot chick, and the guys who don’t….don’t.

So what is this golden nugget of a dating tip? Some men feel like they need to make a woman feel good right off the bat and say something “sweet” – like a compliment about her eyes, her hair, her tight her body is, or whatever. What do the guys who GET IT know that the “complimenters” do not? That this KILLS ATTRACTION. Dead! Now!

Why? Because – and this is great dating advice, so listen up – this is the same damn thing she has just heard from the preceding 10 losers who approached her – and were shot down like a 747 over Bagdad. Even if you are sincere – don’t do it!

OK – best case scenario – you tell this girl how she is the hottest babe in here and you just HAD to come talk to her – that you are in love with her ass or whatever it is you are going to say. She says thank you. Now you are dismissed to wallow in the dregs with the rest of her admirers. You have not created attraction for her, you have not intrigued her, you have just lumped yourself in with everyone else. Way to go!

So what is the dating advice? Every single guy looking to pick up women and create attraction needs to X the word “compliment” from his vocabulary, at least on the first approach. The guys who are successful at approaching women are the guys who say something unique… something challenging… something that creates an EMOTIONAL RESPONSE. And whether that response is positive or negative, it spices it up… and THAT is what fuels the conversation past the awkward first 10 seconds.

Experiment with pushing the envelope and saying something super-edgy… something that immediately gets a charge out of her… that she has NEVER heard before…even if that something gets her goat or makes her take a swing at you – its better than “You have the nicest ass I have ever seen!”

So on your initial approach to a woman, go up to her and ask her opinion on something – hell, ask her if she has any great dating tips for men! Engage her, bust her balls (using David Deangelo’s Cocky Comedy), slip in and slip out in a minute or two telling her you have got to run to keep her defenses down and her attraction up – and don’t ever – ever give a woman a compliment if you are trying to pick her up.

**Readers Q&A on Cocky Comedy**

Hey Dave, how’s it hanging?

Read your stuff…interesting. Makes a lot of sense to appear different then all the others. I have one question, however. This Cocky & Funny stuff (can I call it “friendly mocking”?) really only works on women who are sure of themselves and who will not take your jokes to the heart. But how many of those are in the world? I mean, with today’s “perfect” pop-stars most women have at least some insecurities. So, how can you use this technique and not accidentally hit a weak spot? Is there a neutral Cocky Comedy approach?

J Brooklyn, NY

>>>DAVID DEANGELO’s COMMENTS:

I think you’re hitting on an important point here.

I think that a lot of guys “secretly” want to figure out a way to meet women without RISKING anything.

This is probably why personal ads and online dating web sites are so popular.

The problem with not wanting to RISK anything is that it creates a mindset that leads to being AVERAGE.  And “average” doesn’t create ATTRACTION.

I teach guys to use a specific kind of humor that I call “Cocky & Funny”.

One of the purposes of the Cocky & Funny technique is to clearly demonstrate that you are NOT intimidated by a woman, and to INSTANTLY communicate that you are DIFFERENT from other men.

You’d like to know the magic way to “not accidentally hit a weak spot”…

But guess what?

Accidents happen.

Risk is part of life.

Don’t worry so much about hitting a “weak spot” while you’re teasing or busting on a woman… just concern yourself with making sure you’re being FUNNY while you’re doing it.

If you meet a woman who is so sensitive that she can’t take a joke, or you accidentally” over do it, don’t worry about it. No biggie. She’s probably either too uptight or emotionally fragile for you to have a good time with anyway.

If you want to make a cake, you have to break a few eggs, man.

Remember, your objective isn’t to be MEAN to women, or to hurt them… your objective is to use a specific type of humor to create ATTRACTION.

And give up this “neutral” idea. Neutral is BORING. And Boring is NOT the way to create ATTRACTION.

***SUCCESS STORY*** Using Cocky Comedy and Attracting Women

David,

So, I go into a shoe store the other day and I’m just kind of browsing. The clerk– a cutie of age 21–asks me if she can help me. I kindly ask her to get me a certain pair to try on. As I put the shoes on, she enthusiastically squeaked, “WOW THOSE SHOES LOOK GREAT ON YOU!!!”. I mocked her in the same hi-pitch tone, “YOU’RE ON COMMISION YOU NEED TO SAY THAT!!” She gave me that playful little slap on the arm and told me I was “a little shit”. I go on teasing her for 5 minutes or so and she asks me if I would like a job at this store. When she gave me the application, she also hands me her HOME ADDRESS and phone number and asked me to hand deliver it that night. To keep it short, that night I gave her more than my job resume!!!

Now, David, the previous situation is very unusual for me, as I rarely have much to say, period. I’ve always been very shy and very quiet but am starting to come out of that. I’m not scared to approach women or anything but I just don’t know how to start or keep conversation, you know? I’ve read books on this, listened to tapes and nothing seems to help. Dave, I need some advice!!!

DK Indiana

>>>DAVID DEANGELO’s COMMENTS:

Oh, nice one!

Great example of how to use Cocky & Funny with a woman!

And as for meeting women, stop worrying about STARTING OR KEEPING CONVERSATIONS GOING. Just walk up to women, get their phone numbers, and then get together with them later for a cup of tea.

No “starting of conversations” required.

***QUESTION*** On Cocky Comedy Openers

Hi Dave,

I have been receiving your emails for a while now and boy have they been working. As a matter of fact, I was actually using the Cocky Funny all the time, without even realizing it. For example,

In one of my classes there is this girl that acts weird most of the time (she’s a solid 9.5) and one day she was talking to me, and I just turned around and said to my friend: “Did you say mental hospital?” I got a shot in the arm for that one.

I kept unknowingly using Cocky Funny on her for maybe three days and then after one Cocky Funny comment she replied (with her hand on my shoulder): “I like you, you make me laugh” then she winked and turned around. I was shocked! I mean, I had basically been making fun of her. Little did I know that I had been doing everything right (this was before I started getting your emails).

So anyway, my question. I have no problems meeting women in malls, on campus etc, but what about online? Are there any Cocky Comedy comments or jokes I can use to start a conversation by making a woman laugh? The only ones I can think of are when they have ridiculous/absurd chat names.

Thanks

A

>>>DAVID DEANGELO’s COMMENTS:

Well, one of the GREAT things about teasing women is that you can basically GUESS things about them and they’ll respond.

For instance, if you’re talking to a woman online, and you haven’t seen her picture, you can say:

“OK, you’re probably some hairy, manly, seven hundred pound beast… and that’s why you haven’t sent me your picture…”

(Use this kind of thing when she says that she’s a model or dancer, etc. and it’s obviously not even close.)

The bolder you are, and the funnier, the better you’ll do when guessing.

Try it, you’ll like it.

Use my 3 minute email/number technique, and then break out your killer sense of humor later when you’re alone with her. You’re doing fine… don’t worry about “conversations”.

And if you do wind up in a conversation, just start out by talking about normal things, then transition into the Cocky & Funny material as you progress.

***QUESTION***

David,

First, I LOVE your Cocky Comedy CD program. Everyone; do yourself a favor, BUY David’s stuff! It’s EXCELLENT!!! Well worth the INVESTMENT in YOURSELF!!!

This past Thursday, I was on a second date with this attractive female. Been using the c&f on both dates and she eating it up. Anyway, we end up back at her place. First, we get there and I sit back on the couch. She asks if I want a drink, so I tell her NO. Suggesting that she is just trying to get me drunk. We watch TV for a little bit; then when I was thirsty, I got up and asked her if she wanted a drink. She said no, so when I went to her fridge and I asked her what do you want me to bring you back, because I’m not drinking alone. After we both finish our first drink, I lean over and pecked her on the lips. She tried to kiss me back and I told her to settle down and go get us another drink, which she did.

….Fast forward, after a night of everything, but sex (I didn’t have a condom), as I was kissing her good night (she wanted me to stay, but I was leaving for a trip Friday morning, so I told her No.) She said, “I’m going to regret not sleeping with you in the morning.”

I smile and kiss her. She said, “Maybe next time.” I said, “Maybe.” Then she said, “or the time after that.” That light bulb – my David D. light bulb – went on, this preparedness. Being prepaid I said, “What makes you think I’ll want to have sex with you next time? Or the time after that?”

She said, “You’re a guy and that’s what all guys want.” I said, “Maybe I’ll only kiss you next time.” She said, “I hope we’d AT LEAST do that.” Driving the nail home that I was in control and she wasn’t going to use sex as a weapon, I said, “Fine, then hand holding it is.” She said, “Hand holding?” “Yes, you’ve been promoted to hand holding.”

She said, “How is that a promotion?” I kissed her and said, “I’ll tell you next time.” and left. Needless to say, next time I’ll score, if I want to. LOL!!! Of course I will, because that’s what all guys want. hehehehe!!! This stuff is GREAT!

I do have a question about paying? When is it appropriate to let her pay? How often? How do I let her pay without being perceived as a wussy?

Thanks again. You have changed my life for the better. I now get it. Plus, it’s fun to watch the guys who Chicago-land This stuff is VERY POWERFUL, use it with caution.

J Chicagoland

>>>DAVID DEANGELO’s COMMENTS:

Very nice.

Mixed messages, teasing, stepping back, making her feel anticipation and want it badly… GREAT. This is a great example of how to handle a situation like this one.

As far as letting women pay…The whole topic of “paying” is kind of a pain. Dates should be free! 🙂

It has gotten into many women’s heads that if a guy pays it means that he’s a “gentleman” and if he doesn’t it means that “he’s not”. Whatever!