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Four Tips For Recognizing An Unhealthy Relationship

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Four Tips For Recognizing An Unhealthy RelationshipIt’s been said that you never truly know a person until you’ve lived with them for a few years. Many relationships start out on seemingly good footing until, some time down the road, the bumps appear. Suddenly, you realize you partner is no longer who you fell in love with. These problems occur all of the time, which may explain why America’s divorce rate is at a staggering 60 percent, with an average marriage length of ten years or less. Fortunately, there are ways you can identify an unhealthy relationship and act before things get too out of hand.

Trust Issues

Trust is a key component of a healthy relationship. When your partner behaves suspiciously for no good reason, lies to you or invades your privacy, there is a problem with trust. This can take the form of interrogating you after going out with friends, skimming through your emails, browsing history and phone records and making baseless accusations. On the other hand, if your partner exhibits shifty behavior, has frequent unaccountable absences or appears to be hiding something, you have every right to be distrustful.

Controlling

Controlling behavior is often deeply rooted in insecurity and inevitably breeds problems. Even when people are in a relationship, they require some level of independence. If someone shows a desire to control who your friends are, how you dress, what you do online, where you work, how to spend your money or otherwise tells you what to do, it’s a big neon sign indicating an emotionally abusive relationship.

Problems With Anger

All couples fight and argue occasionally, but when someone gets angry frequently and at the drop of a hat, it’s something to be wary of. You can tell this is a problem when you constantly feel like you’re dreading the next outburst. You may even find yourself altering your opinions, habits and actions just to prevent conflicts. Anger issues are especially problematic because they’re often a prelude to physical abuse.

Threatening or Violent Behavior

Even if they’ve never acted on it, if your partner has made threats toward your life or safety, it’s critical that you end the relationship. Physical abuse doesn’t usually happen right away. Stay alert for signs of impending violence from your partner such as throwing or breaking items, grabbing or restraining you or using violent gestures meant to provoke fear.

No relationship is perfect, and they all have their hard times. However, for the sake of your own happiness and safety, you owe it to yourself to know when things in a relationship are unacceptable or dangerous.

Niche Dating Sites

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THERE ARE 90 MILLION SINGLES IN AMERICA.  OVER 40 MILLION OF THEM HAVE TRIED ONLINE DATING and more continue trying it as an acceptable way to form a relationship.  The wide spread use of the internet and technological advancements have contributed changing Internet dating, which got its start in 1995 with Match.com.  Today, online dating sites are becoming more in tune with specific needs by bringing together people who share “like” interests.  Referred to as niche dating sites, currently there are over 2,000 such sites offering nearly any interest.  Here are some of the most popular sites that should help you find a more suited relationship.

Focusing On Your Requirements

These new sites do not spend time on useless information transfer. Focus is on the what critical commonalities that will help you to find your soul mate, niche-dating-sites-smallexactly how you have desired. Through these websites, you can pin point your search query to hobby based, location based, sports orientation based, official standard based or even based on ethnic groups. Therefore, it is apparent that these sites are offering you far better chance of obtaining information about available individuals from your desired specification circle. For example- if you are a fan of swimming technique or if you are passionate about mountain biking, then it would be better for you to go out with individuals with matching interests.  It will improve your relationship and help you to initiate a mature conversation with your date. That is exactly what these new sites offer. This is the apparent reason of success of these new websites.

Research Superiority

Another feature of niche dating sites is offering research superiority. Nobody would want to fill up an extended form with information just to find his or her favorite person online. It is tiring and bit monotonous. As we are living in the Internet age, we expect information to be fast and at our finger tips. This is exactly what niche dating sites do. These web platforms are designed in such a manner that you can enter your search query and relevant information comes up instantly. It is hard for people from small demographic groups to find someone with matching preferences. They generally have to go through hundreds of candidates and profiles to find someone they want. However, with niche dating platforms, search criteria have gained pinpoint accuracy.                                                                   click to enlarge  =>

Why Niche Dating Sites Are Better Than Board Search Dating Platforms?    

With increasing demand for specific interests and preferences, are becoming a populare alternative over the broad based platforms. When a client obtains membership in a broad dating site, they are presented with numerous selection options. Cross-referencing each option is a difficult process and a time-consuming job for any individual. However, niche sites narrow down the specification eliminating useless information.

In fact, today the overwelming majority of the over 1500+ dating sites are niche dating sites. You can find a site that will cater to just about any interest, fetish, religion, trait, or hobby. From bookworm to beauty queen and from stache lovers to sea captains it is highly likely you will find a dating site that geared to just about anything that trips your trigger.

The infographic gives you some stats and information on the niche dating world. Use this as a quick guide to get started in the niche dating world and for even a bigger resource check out our dating website database with over 500 dating websites listed and growing. You can find it here at The Online Dating Database.

NICHE DATING SITES INFOGRAPHIC

Campus Crush: 4 Tips To Help You Finally Get Noticed

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Enjoy Campus Love Life

Campus Crush 4 Tips To Help You Finally Get NoticedSo you have a crush on a campus hottie but don’t know how to get her to notice you. Maybe you are a little shy when it comes to approaching girls, or maybe you tend to blend in with the crowd for fear of drawing too much attention to yourself. Despite what you may think, you already have plenty of great qualities, you just need to be confident in your abilities and know how to present yourself to your crush in an approachable way.

Be friendly

Try to be friendly without displaying ulterior motives. When you see your crush around campus, make eye contact and flash a quick smile. Don’t stare too long, but don’t be afraid to make eye contact; make sure she knows you notice her presence. If you are in the same class, ask her a simple question about something you are learning in class, even if you already know the answer. Opening the lines of communication is essential. For all you know, she could have a crush on you but maybe she’s too shy to initiate contact. If you don’t seem friendly, all bets are off.

Dress to impress

Make sure that you wear clothing that fits well and is in style. This will let your crush know that you take care of yourself and care how you look. Consider dressing in a similar style as your crush while still maintaining a sense of self. It will make her think you have more in common with each other. If she is more into punk rock, buy a pair of converse sneakers to go with your flashy shirt or hip v-neck.  Making statements with your clothing is one sure way to get her attention.

Display confidence

Confidence is key in life and it is an attractive quality. It shows that you are comfortable with yourself and makes you more approachable. Walk with your shoulders and head up and walk like you know where you are going. When you talk to your crush, speak as if you’re talking to a long time friend. If you have to fake it, that’s alright; no one else will ever know. After forcing confidence for a while, it will come naturally.

Befriend your crush’s friends

The more friends you have in common, the more you will hang around each other. Her friends might even tell your crush about how sweet or friendly you are. Just remember, be friendly to her friends and more flirty with your crush—you don’t want her to think you aren’t interested in her because you are flirting with their friends.

If you are used to sitting back and admiring from a far, now is the time to step it up and make her notice you! These subtle tips will help you catch her eye, and hopefully make you more than just “classmates.”

First Date: Five Things You Need To Do

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First Date 5 Ways to Make A Good Impression Immediately

Make Her First Impression of You A Lasting Impression

A first date is usually the most daunting and intimidating part of the dating process. If you dress the wrong way, or are not adequately groomed, it could potentially set your date off on the wrong foot before you even say a word.  Here are five things you need to do to make a great impression on your first date.

 

1) Dress for comfort and style

Dress in what makes you comfortable, but do not be over-revealing or over the top. If you usually dress in baggy, revealing clothing, it may be best to put on more conservative attire for the first date. If you are an eccentric dresser, it may be best to tone it down a little bit at first. Put on something that makes you feel good, cool, and confident yet still reveals some aspect of your personality.

 

2) Don’t be too formal, but don’t be overly casual

If you dress too much for the occasion, your date will obviously notice. If the date is at a more formal restaurant, obviously take note and wear something a tad more dressy. If it is at a casual sporting event, however, it is best to dress down a bit. Perhaps wear one of your cool, casual and pretty damn amazing blazers. No matter how you dress, your date will be able to tell if you have a nice body.

 

3) Bring accessories and wear shoes that compliment your outfit

An otherwise nice outfit can be ruined by the wrong pair of shoes. Remember to think of every detail. Also make sure your shoes are polished and clean. A date-ready outfit starts with making everything come together.

 

4) Stay away from your cell phone

Cell phones are ruinous to intimate one-on-one conversations. In the middle of your date, do not whip out your cell phone to respond to a text or check your mail inbox. Your date may see it as rude and would likely be correct in that assumption.

 

5) Listen and respond thoughtfully

Be honest, listen, and be careful not to dominate the conversation. Do not be completely self-absorbed, but do not be so quiet as to make your date feel awkward or think that you are not having a good time. Additionally, being honest in what you say will help you in the long-term. You do not want to have a relationship with someone that is based on lies as it is not sustainable forever.

Bonus Tip:

6) Relax and be yourself!

True Commitment Phobia

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You Can Overcome Commitment Phobia and Enjoy Your Relationship!

phobic man

Do you have commitment phobia?

Commitment phobia can be a serious issue when it comes to being in a relationship, but it is something that can be overcome.

We hear a lot about commitment phobia, but is it psychological or just an excuse?  Well, it’s actually both.  Some people actually have psychological issues when it comes to commitment.  Others use it as a way to avoid commitment on their part, but continue to benefit from the commitment of someone else. In this article we will be discussing the psychological aspects of commitment phobia.

Simply stated, commitment phobia is the fear of committing.  Some people may fear committing to decisions in general, while others may fear commitment to a relationship.  There’s more than one reason why a person may fear relationship commitment.  Some may find it difficult to give up their freedom, and others may fear getting too close due to past experiences.

Signs of Commitment Phobia

The signs are different for everyone.  The way a person reacts depends on what type of commitment they fear, why they fear it, their personality, and how they respond. After reviewing a large amount of content identifying signs of commitment phobia, I found there to be a lot of inaccurate information out there.

Some of the most common ways commitment Phoebes react are by:

•          Constantly whining or complaining.

•          Creating an on again-off again relationship.

•          Finding something wrong with anyone that they begin to fall for.

•          Distancing themselves when things begin to get serious.

•          Avoiding making plans.

 

Among the many signs that I read form various articles I found a few to generally be accurate.  Here they are:

•          Becomes emotionally detached.

•          Continuously starts arguments over silly little things, and always blame it on you.

•          Has a habit of making plans, changing them, or backing out of them at the last minute.

•          Distant when it comes to talking about feelings or relationships.

•          Doesn’t want you around their family and friends.

•          Don’t like to talk about future plans with you.

•          Have had several past relationships that were going good, and then suddenly they ended them.

•          Say that they want to spend time with you, but then suddenly change their mind.

•          Choose to date others with busy schedules or who live away.

•          Unpredictable and unreliable in a relationship.

•          Moody when it comes to relationship issues.

•          Don’t like planning ahead.

•          Get frustrated when you mess with or add to their personal things.

Man and woman holding hands in handcuffs

Other signs I found that could be true for some commitment phoebes but not others were:

•          Doesn’t want to commit right away. (They may just need to get to know their partner first.)

•          Takes a while to say “I loves you”. (Often is a good sign that they mean it when they do say it.)

•          Moves a lot. (Could be due to financial issues, work, or other things unrelated.)

•          Changes jobs often. (Could be moving up or searching for the right job.)

•          Picky about who they date. (It pays to be a little picky.)

•          Dates people who aren’t compatible. (It takes a while to determine who is compatible.)

•          Has mood changes. (Could be due to other psychological issues.)

•          Charming, and know how to get what they want. (Wow, I’m speechless.)

•          Attractive and successful yet single.  (Maybe that right person still hasn’t been found.)

•          Unfaithful and not truthful.  (Hmm, this sounds more like an excuse…)

•          Play head games.  (A lot of people play head games for a lot of different reasons.)

•          Doesn’t want you at their home, but want to meet at your instead.  (It sounds like they are hiding something.)

•          Had several short relationships. (This may be due to bad luck, it depends on who ended the relationships and why.)

•          Don’t have many processions. (Maybe they have a small place, lost everything, or don’t have much income.)

•          Has a freelance careers or travels frequently for work. (Maybe this is just their ling of work, saying freelancers are commitment phoebes is like saying cats don’t have hair just because a few don’t.)

 

Getting Over It

Hypnotized man

Hypnotherapy is used successfully for many phobias, including relationship commitment.

In order to get over a commitment phobia a person must first recognize that they have it.  Next the cause needs to be determined.  Is it a fear of getting hurt due to past relationships, or past events that occurred during childhood? Is it a fear of decision making? Maybe it’s a fear of losing freedom?  Once the cause is determined, the process of overcoming it can begin.

There are many options for overcoming a phobia including hypnotherapy and anchoring, but the best way to overcome it is through self-help techniques.

Journaling is a great way to gain a better understand of yourself. Write down uncomfortable situations, why they were uncomfortable, feelings they caused, reactions, and alternative reactions. Reflecting on past situations, feelings, and reactions is a great way to learn how to cope with and overcome certain feelings.

Moving on is an important step in overcoming fears resulting from past experiences. Pick the positive things that resulted from the experience and what was learned from the experience.  Learn from the experience but don’t take it to the extreme.  The same thing doesn’t happen every time.  Let the past experiences can make a person stronger person, or they can make a person with fears. Choose to be the stronger person.

A good way to overcome a fear is to face it.  Some fears have to be proven wrong.   The only way to do that is to give things a chance.  You will never know how something might have turned out if you never gave it a chance.  Why continue traumatizing yourself because you fear you might get hurt. It’s not worth it if you are hurting yourself in the process.

Challenge negative thoughts.  Could it really be that bad? What am I really afraid of?  Why am I making myself miserable now to avoid making myself miserable? Maybe it won’t work out, but if it does it would be great!

The Partner’s Role

Having the right partner when trying to overcome a phobia is important because if they aren’t understanding they may make things worse.  It is important that the partner:

•          Not pressure.

•          Give space and not smother.

•          Demonstrate the positive aspects of commitment.

•          Don’t give ultimatums.

•          Is someone trustworthy and open.

•          Is patient.

•          Understands even a person who fears commitment still loves.

 

Conclusion

newlyweds on beach

Kicking commitment phobia can ultimately reward you with getting the girl of your dreams!

Commitment phobia doesn’t mean “unable to love”.  It means “fear to commit”.  It’s a fear that can be overcome, and it should be. It isn’t something that occurs in only a certain group of people.  It can happen to anyone. Some attractive successful single people may have it, but online free daters may too.  It doesn’t matter if you are from Australia or Europe, it just depends on who they are as a person and their past.

Today’s article contribution comes from Paul Fredrick who works at Free Dating Sites Australia. See more of Paul’s tips and advices here:   http://www.freedatingaustralia.com.au/brisbane-qld