Ok guys, let’s talk some straight body language tips here. Women want a real man, and from the first moment she sees you, she is sizing you up. She is looking for a MAN – and the definition of an attractive Man to a woman is dominant, alpha male. I don’t mean be a jerk – I mean be confidant, sure of yourself, display your “prowess” in other words. Let her know that you are powerful and able man.

On the flip side of that, there are some dead giveaways to a woman that you are NOT these things to her, and it will turn her off faster than a light switch. These are sure fire attraction KILLERS. Never, under any circumstance, project any of these body language traits when you are trying to pick up women (or under any circumstance, for that matter).

A few of them are:

1) Can’t maintain eye contact

2) Has slumped, submissive posture

3) Fidgets nervously

4) Gives away his power

5) Looks for attention and approval from others

Of course, there are so many “little attraction signals” that women look for to make that snap decision about what kind of man you are and INSTANTLY know whether or not you are worth another thought. ALL of this in conveyed through your BODY LANGUAGE.

Now, as I said earlier, these “decisions” that women make about attraction all happen on a subconscious level. Women don’t look at a guy, then say to a friend, “Well, he held eye contact when I looked at him, and he was standing straight with his head up high in a dominant posture so I’m going to give him a chance”.

It’s simply an immediate, instinctive feeling that women get. They use these little body language cues to instantly size you up, then respond without even knowing it.

Dominance (attraction) can also be confirmed by your attitude when that initial eye contact goes a bit farther. You can say something cocky and funny to her, like “I just couldn’t help noticing you… [pause]… STARING at me…” or , “Do you always maintain such strong eye contact? Or do you only stare at guys like me that you can’t help it with?”

Try anything. You’re in the right place… I mean, you don’t even have to expend the energy to walk over and start a conversation! At least say Hi! Show her that you are a) not afraid to talk to her (i.e. not afraid of rejection/her opinion of you) b) aware that she is attracted to you (even if you are not sure, play it like she is and attraction will follow!) and c) a little out of her reach (because you are HIGHER STATUS than she is).

Is there a such thing as a human mating dance? It is very clear in nature when two animals are mating, because they use their body language to display it, with complex rituals, dances, displays or projects. These rituals are hardwired into the animals, they are completely instinctual, not something they learn from their parents or from a movie on the discovery channel.

So, do human beings have a mating dance, a set of ritual courtship steps that we go through in the process of selecting a mate and proceeding from that selection into the consummation of that selection? Yes, we do. However, most men do not KNOW the steps of that dance, and therefore will not be chosen by a woman to be their mate.

Let us digress for just a moment. How is a solid gold coin different from paper money? Paper money is actually a representation of money, it is not worth anything outside the value of what society or the government has placed upon it. The gold coin has value outside of monetary value, it can be melted down and made into other objects.

In this same vein, how is body language different than other languages? Body language is an innate method of communication that is incapable of lying, as well as has no language barrier. A smile is a universal sign, whereas the word “hello” is different in languages around the world. According to Dr. Albert Mehrabian in his Psychology Today article, it is estimated that only 7% of communication is purveyed by words, 38% by voice tone and the remaining 55% by facial expression and body language.

Body Language and expression, then, are KEY COMPONENTS in understanding the complexities and mechanics of attraction. I highly recommend STUDYING Body Language if the mechanics of attraction interest you at all. By studying Body language, you can learn the subtle signals and methods of sparking attraction with a woman that 99% of the population have NO IDEA exist at all. The Naturals? THEY KNOW. The guys you see at the bars and clubs just picking up woman after woman? THEY KNOW. The dork-wad making moon eyes at every hottie that walks by him and getting rejected more times than a dick flavored sucker? HE does NOT know.

That being said, how about some recommendations? If you want to get in the know, you have got to check out Carlos Xuma’s Approach Program – he can teach you some AMAZING things about Body Language and how it affects the mating dance in a real and tangible way.

Here are some of the things Carlos will teach you:

• What instinct you must trust to enable your long-term success with women…
• How to interpret and handle open/closed body language so that you’re not tricked again…
• What is the difference between men and women and how they express interest or disinterest in body language…?
• How to find the single most important indicator of interest from a woman and how you need to read it to stay on track when you’re building attraction…?
• What are the specific definitions of each of her body movements and how to read them all…?
• What are the Positive vs. Negative Indicators from a woman – and which ones you can trust to read her correctly and not waste your time?
• Proxemics – What they are, and how they work in different settings…
• My 2 Essential Techniques to use to get a woman to feel trust and rapport with you so that you can get past the games and get really connected…
• The Approach Killers – I’ll give you ALL the mistakes guys typically make during the approach – and how you can learn to avoid them…
• How to use my “Assume the Bond” strategy and have her feeling like she’s known you her whole life…
• The one thing you must communicate with your words to make your approach succeed, and if you don’t communicate this, she’ll just walk away…

There’s even more inside this program…

• What you absolutely must NOT do during your approach to avoid the “uncomfortable silence” situation – and how you can stop this from ever happening again…
• How to use “Monk’s Discipline” for perseverance to success with women and getting conversations that not only keep going until you want to leave them, you’ll have her hooked on you…
• I’ll destroy the myths about “rejection” and “approach anxiety” that guys like us feel, and I’ll show you how to rid yourself of the fear and shyness that holds you back from approaching the really beautiful women you see in the bars…
• Why most approaches fail, and what you can do to easily double your success rate at getting numbers from women…
• You’ll understand the Five Levels of Approachers – Figure out which one you are, and how to achieve phenomenal growth by using the right approach strategies for your level…
• The A.I.M. Method of approaching, explained in detail from start to finish – a complete system of how to approach women – for every guy at any skill level…
• How to give yourself the mind-set you must have to ensure you are never rejected or lose confidence when you’re talking with women ever again…
• Tons of Example Approaches – you’ll have specific word-for-word approaches for meeting girls at a:
  • Restaurant
  • Grocery store
  • Department store
  • Bar
  • Club
  • Park
  • Parking Lot
  • Street or sidewalk
  • Bookstore
  • Your Local Coffee Shop
  • Party
  • Any Group Setting
  • Festival or a Street fair
  • Convention
  • Your Gym or Exercise Club
  • An Art Show
  • ANYWHERE you see a woman you want to meet

I have a concept, and it goes like this . . . There’s a kind of build-up of attraction that happens when a man and a woman meet. You could say that the more attraction happens, the more attraction it creates. This process happens very differently for men than it does for women. For men, it can happen instantly, and be over instantly. For women, it tends to build up over time, and then go away over time. I call this concept: “ATTRACTION MOMENTUM.”

Men are very visual and they are instantly attracted to a woman, sometimes so much so that they lose all sense of reality and their surroundings. Women are initially attracted to a man’s looks, but beyond that something else is also happening. Women are also attracted to a man’s energy, confidence, the tone of his voice, and the way he listens when they speak.

A woman’s attraction to a man is complicated, while a man is overstimulated on the visual side like a giant Scooby Doo. To attract a man, a woman needs to be able to seduce his eyes with her sex appeal. To attract a woman, a man needs to intrigue and seduce her mind.

This is where men lose the connection. They tend to try to “wow” a woman in the same way they would go about trying to impress a fellow man.

Let me go further into this. A good woman friend once told me “The more a man speaks, the drier I get. I wish sometimes he would not say a word so I can remain turned on and attracted to him.” This is the cold hard truth. Most men have no idea that in order to create attraction, they need to shut up and listen.

Men tend to try to close a woman by selling themselves to her. What happens in reality, however, is that the more they sell the less the attraction to them becomes. Men are what I call “wing flappers.” They think that by trying to impress a woman with their life accomplishments, they will seduce her and attract her . . . which is far from the truth.

The key to attracting women and creating the “attraction momentum” is a 3 step process.

Step 1 is the initial approach. Women can see you coming from a mile away. They smell you, and if they are attracted to you they want you to approach them. But it is the way you approach that will cause the attraction momentum to either rise or fall.

Men that walk over immediately are ones who tend to be received well by women. Ask any woman what her feelings are about the way a man approaches, and she will tell you that if she hears the “Jaws” theme playing in her head she will lose any of the initial attraction that she was feeling. Most men tend to circle like sharks for hours before they approach, and by the time they finally do approach the woman is turned off by him.

What happens next, i.e., Step 2, is another attraction key that will either raise her level of interest or decrease the attraction.

Most men will talk at a woman with random thoughts. Men tend to speak in random circles . . . That works in the man world. Take the following example. Two men are sitting in a café watching a game on TV. This is how a conversation would typically go:

Man 1: “You hungry?”

Man 2: “Yes.”

Man 1: “Wow! Did you see that throw?”

Man 2: “Yes, that was great. Hey . . . Check her out!”

Man 1: “Hot!”

Man 2: “Yeah, really hot. So, how’s work?”

Man 1: “Good. Any you?”

Man 2: “Good. What do you want to eat?”

Man 1: “Sandwich maybe . . . Wow! Look at that play.”

Man 2: “Forget the play. Look at her!”

Man 1: “Hot.”

Man 2: “Yeah, I think I want a sandwich too. Let’s order.”

So now that you’ve seen what “man talk” looks like, let’s look at the conversation of two women in the same café so you can understand how women react to each other and how they speak to one another.

Women 1: “How was your date last night?”

Women 2: “It was ok.”

Women 1: “Just ok? Why? What happened?”

Women 2: “He was really funny, but …”

Women 1: “But what?”

Women 2: “He did something when the waitress came over that
really made me think.”

Women 1: “What did he do? Was he checking her out?”

Women 2: “I am not sure. I have been running it through my head,
and I just can’t get a reading on it.”

Women 1: “Details please! Let’s figure this out . . .”

Do you see the difference? Women get deeper in one conversation, while men talk in random circles eventually getting back to the original conversation.

So now you can see how attraction momentum works. Men need to learn the trigger points in women . . . how they think, how they react, and how they speak. Most men will talk to a woman in “man talk” and when they do, they will cause the attraction momentum to go down instead of up.

For every woman that is sitting in a café reading the newspaper, there is a man thinking that he can just walk over to her with some canned line and a few follow-up questions. Men believe that there is an approach that will work in all situations, or that there are custom approaches that will work regardless of what she says. It’s that mindset that kills all attraction for women, yet men think that there is some magic approach that will work in all situations.

Men will actually spend time looking for someone who can give them that answer, that “magic approach,” so they will be attractive to all women in all situations. Men will use an approach over and over, memorizing it so they can perform it in front of a woman. The truth is that women are looking to connect with a man . . . not to watch a one man show.

That alone will kill the attraction momentum for women. Women are present in the moment whereas men think about what they have to say.

So let’s see how the attraction momentum is killed in a café . . . and this is after a woman has smiled and checked out the man.

Man: “Can I borrow a section of your paper?”

Woman: “Yes, you can.”

Man: “Are you having a good day?”

Woman: “Yes I am . . . but this story about Iraq is really disturbing.”

Man: “Do you live here?”

Woman: “Yes . . . around the corner. I love this area.”

Man: “What do you do for work?”

See, a man walks over and he has these predetermined questions that he wants to ask her already in his mind. And not once did he pick up on anything that she was saying, which in turn is causing the attraction momentum to go down as each word comes out of his mouth. Because they don’t listen, men tend to kill the attraction once they open their mouths. Step 3, therefore, is to remain present in the moment and to listen to what a woman is saying.

There are also many other ways a man can kill attraction.

Another way that a man kills the attraction momentum is when he looks at a woman like a desperate, hungry wolf staring at its next meal. Or when he’s out with a hungry testosterone-laden wolf pack, he will poke a friend five times before talking to a woman. Women don’t communicate like hungry wolves about to eat a meal.

Women communicate in a whole different language. When they look at a man, they admire a man. They don’t look at him like he’s about to be put on the grill.

Women like to be looked at a certain way in order to build attraction. By looking at a woman with a very seductive, sexy, George Clooney smile, you will be able to turn her on in ways you’ve never imagined! In order for attraction to build in a woman, you need to do it slowly and seductively. You also need to jump into her head and start a conversation based on thoughts she’s already having. So . . . how do you do this?

First, you need to observe what she’s doing so you can jump into her head when you talk to her. This way, the conversation is based on something she’s already feeling or doing so it’s natural. Most men will walk over to a woman and do the exact opposite like the example above. In a second, I am going to show you a conversation that you can have anywhere that will get you to bond with a woman and create far greater attraction than you’ve ever had before.

The second dating tip before we go through that conversation, is to keep present in the moment so that the conversation is just an extension of her thoughts. If what you say is an extension of her thoughts, she won’t even realize what’s happening. She won’t have her defenses up, and by doing this you will be bonding with her about the things she’s already thinking.

The third, and most important, thing that makes the attraction meter go up instead of down, is to listen and to react to what she is saying. In my earlier example, I talked about two women and how they have a conversation. Women start on a subject and then go deeper into it, creating a bond between them. That is the exact type of bond you need to create with a woman in order to cause the attraction to rise instead of fall.

Most guys when they approach a woman, create a whole new feeling, thought and conversation. Take, for example, a woman who might be eating a peach at a farmer’s market. A typical guy will walk over and ask her a question about the weather, instead of picking the obvious thing like I’m about to show you.

Let’s take the peach example. You see a woman eating a juicy peach at a farmer’s market. So how do you come across as the confident male instead of the bumbling guy that has nothing to say? The first step you’ve already done, i.e., observed what she’s doing. The second step is to walk over immediately. Walk over with authority and confidence. When you approach her, be playful and say:

Man: “That looks great. Can I have a bite?”

Woman: “I don’t know . . . I don’t know if I’m in the mood to share today.”

Man: “What, you don’t like to share?”

Woman: “I love to share, but I don’t even know you.”

Man: “What do you need to know in order for me to get a bite of that peach?”

Woman: “Well, we could start with your name.”

Man: “So all I need to do is tell you my name, and I’ll get a bite of that peach?”

Woman: “Maybe . . .”

Man: “I’ll tell you what. Take me to where you got that peach and I’ll get my own.
Then we’ll compare and see who got the better peach. We’ll go bite for bite.”

Woman: “You’re on . . .I’ll go bite for bite. I believe in my peach.”

Man: “What else do you believe in?”

At this point you’ve now segued away from the peach, and opened the door to her sharing her thoughts with you. You’ve also been very playful and you’ve challenged her. You’ve turned a simple approach into a fun game. Plus the game was all about something she was already doing. Most men fail to create attraction because they talk in random thoughts, which is not “woman talk.” I have found in coaching thousands of women over the last 10 years that the only way to build attraction in a woman is to bond with her in the moment and jump inside her head.

Don’t believe me….. So you have to understand, to meet the most amazing women everyday and have them desire you, you have to connect with them on a higher level than you ever have before. It’s not about what to say it is how you approach and how to say it!! I go over all this in great Detail in my Men’s Master series audio program.

Talk to you soon and looking forward to hearing about all of your success with women!!

Your Friend

David Wygant