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Avoiding the Horrors of Online Dating

March 27, 2013 By GetTheGirl

Insights into Online Dating Success

Conceptual photo of a couple sitting on laptop

Most dating sites are good at weeding out the creeps, but always move with some caution.

Online dating is no doubt the latest trend in finding someone special, but how do you really know that the person you are talking to is serious? There are people out there who use their profiles on dating sites to lie, cheat and steal. There are those who are already married and looking for a little something on the side, or those who are not who they seem to be online and those who are just losers trying to make themselves look good. There are ways to make sure that you are talking to the person you think you are talking to and not a loser or someone who has already said “I Do.”

Google Them

3d laptop with big red heart

Google has over 50 trillion pages indexed.

Google is a wonderful tool where you can find anything just by putting a name into the search engine. When the results come up on Google, Bing or any other search engine you prefer, you will find just about anything you want to know. Through Google, you can find out financial information, employment information and even their current marital status. If you really want to dig, you can also get a hold of where they live and even what their home is worth.

Social Networks

Social networks are the latest and greatest feature in the world of online dating. Through sites like Facebook, you can locate pictures, status updates and friends of the person you are talking to. You can see if they are in a relationship, if they have children, what other people are saying about them and just about anything else you want to know. People today put just about everything on Facebook, from their personal thoughts to current photographs, giving you the upper hand in knowing what you are getting into and who you are really talking to.

 Double Dates are Great

sexy young woman in a bathrobe

It’s nice when the girl you thought you were talking online with shows up as herself.

When the time comes to meet the person you have exchanged emails with or talked to on the phone, it is a good idea to take a friend with you. Many people adapt better in a group setting, so when the first date is a double date, it is easier to adapt, talk and just break the ice. Of course, there are other features that make this a great idea as well – like your friends being able to get a feel for who you are out with and if they are going to be the right person for you. It is also easier for an outside source to notice if something just does not add up with the person you are out with, like the tan line where their wedding ring was.

It is no secret that you never really know somebody who you met online. While online dating seems to be taking off, it is possible to meet some psycho who wants to lead a double life. The beauty is that this is just a fraction of those who are looking for love through the internet. Most people who are on internet dating sites are just like you; they only want to find the right person who will love them for who they are. You will find that person, but you might have to kiss a few frogs before you find them.

Kara Fielder is a working mom with two kids. She enjoys blogging regularly for a variety of websites. Click for money-saving coupons from Cheap Sally.

Filed Under: Articles, Meeting Women Online

Love in an Algorithm: Dating Datasets

March 26, 2013 By GetTheGirl

How Dating Sites Find You a Girlfriend

Online Dating Computer Key Showing Romance And Web LovePersonal encounters are great ways to find a girlfriend, but if you want to increase your odds with some additional help, you might look to dating sites.  Because a dating site is anonymous at gathering information (and automatic as far as your concerned), it can do it more quickly than you can.  For instance, in a personal encounter it can take some time just to find out the likes and dislikes of the girl you’re talking to.  You need to get the basics down before you decide if you even might like this girl.  The same goes for her too!

What dating sites do is cut down much of this initial information gathering and deciphering.  The information is provided by each member and the deciphering is done by what is called an algorithm.  Whilst algorithm’s don’t sound like a very romantic way of finding your true love, many online dating sites use the data they collect in a mathematical way in order to find you a suitable partner.

What is an algorithm?

Woman on couch with laptop computer

She will start imagining about you and her together. Put your best foot forward, but don’t present something that you can’t live up to.

It really is essentially a dressed up name for a step-by-step process that uses a series of calculations in order to solve a problem. An algorithm uses a set of ingredients in pretty much the same way that a recipe does, with the aim of using everything that you have available on the list in the right order and quantities as a way of baking that perfect cake.

When it comes to online dating, algorithm’s are used to sort out the data that has been input and using a series of complex filters and instructions, the program should provide the best match on their database with a person who is deemed to be highly compatible with you.

What you see is what you get?

Any software system is only as good as the information that it has to work with so anyone who is perhaps being economical with the truth in either their physical description or perhaps their likes and dislikes together with their chosen leisure pursuits, will be matched with someone who probably does have those genuine physical traits and interests, all of which will quickly become apparent if you both end up meeting in the flesh. To get the best out of a dating site that uses algorithm’s to create the perfect match, you just have to be honest with your answers in the first place, and then the computer can get to work using genuine data.

Why all the questions?

If you assume that hopefully everyone that signs up to a dating site is going to supply honest answers then the questions that you get asked are designed to filter out a lot of mismatches, the problem is that you generally need to ask a lot of questions in order to get a truly accurate set of results. We humans are a pretty complex species and you really do need to ask what seems like an endless stream of questions in order to get a worthwhile response.

What is the right answer to give?

Even if you are fundamentally trying to give an honest answer to any question that you are being asked by the dating site, many of us still choose to provide an aspirational answer that has a hint of honesty attached to it. It is fine to create an idealized version of ourselves but the issue is that it then tends to produce a skewed profile as a result. On a more basic level, when we set up a Facebook profile we tend to list things such as our favorite music, books we have read or films we like, all of which give an insight into the type of person that we may be in an easy to digest snapshot, whereas a dating site uses an algorithm to delve a bit deeper and try to add a bit more substance to the answers that we give them.

Do the algorithm’s work?

Couple Sitting Together

After getting to know each other by internet, there is nothing like meeting in person!

As a way of eliminating some obvious non-starters and getting your list of potentially suitable partners then most of the systems in use seem to have a reasonable degree of success, after you have had some initial dialogue over the internet, and reached a comfort level that you want to meet this girl – after all that’s what it is all about! – then there is there is no substitute for meeting someone face to face.  Personal chemistry and good old fashioned intuition are a couple of things that the computer finds hard to get a handle on, no matter how many questions that they ask.

Krista Joseph is a sex therapist and avid blogger. She enjoys keeping up with the latest sex products that help couples enjoy a happy sex life. Visit Simply Pleasure for more ideas.

Filed Under: Articles, Meeting Women Online

How to Use FaceBook To Meet Women

February 20, 2013 By GetTheGirl

Dating Advice for Men by Carlos Xuma

4 Step Guide to Meeting Women – How to Use Facebook to Meet Women

 

meeting girls with facebook

With all the social media sites out there, one has taken the world by storm: Facebook. And it only comes naturally that guys will want to leverage this new tool to meet women.

It’s not too hard to meet women on Facebook, but you have to do it with some understanding of how to play the game. Because there are many ways to do it wrong, and only a few to do it right…

I’ve been eyeing this method to meeting women for some time, and I agree completely. It IS a mega-mega opportunity to meet women…

…if it’s handled right.

First of all, let’s remember the catastrophe that is “MySpace.” (May it rest in peace.) That social network has been so polluted and abused that it’s really not useful anymore. I know I don’t take it seriously.

What happened there?

Well, first of all, everyone got slammed with spam. A few clever programmers and bulk friend programs, and suddenly you had MySpace pages that looked like web sites from the year 1998.

Cheap backgrounds, silly wallpaper, and everybody’s page looked like a 14-year-old girl’s bedroom, complete with Britney Spears posters.

Enter Facebook.

A whole lot classier than its trailer-park cousin, Facebook has maintained a better image. But with a bunch of cool toys and add-ons that made it interesting and more fun.

So how can you work this great social networking tool to help you with your dating life – while not looking like some pervert who got kicked out of the alleys of MySpace?

I’ll give you a very simple 4-step model to use. This is the one that my friends and I have used consistently to get results online.

STEP 1: Connect with the guys – and other women – who have a lot of cute girl friends.

In other words, connect with people that YOU are not interested in dating who have big networks.

You must be very indirect at first using Facebook.

Remember the lesson from MySpace – Don’t be a spammer!

This is not “match.com” or an online dating site, so don’t just start sending out invites and emails hoping to score based on numbers. We’ve come to hate the abusers, and you’ll just get your sorry ass kicked right off.

Start out with light connections. Think “friends first.”

Don’t make your Facebook profile look like you’re trying to meet women. Be subtle.

What you’re trying to do is multiply your results and increase your connection potential by meeting more people who know more people.

If you just start trying to hit on the women you’re interested in right off the bat, you’ll be limiting your results with shortsighted thinking.

Think out to the LONG term. The more cool people you connect with and forge relationships with, the more likely you are to connect with a woman naturally.

STEP 2: Connect with women you are interested in VERY indirectly.

What you have to do is send a simple friend request – and make sure you include a message with it!

You just say something like, “Hey, I saw we’re both friends with Greg… Then I noticed you’re a snowboarder, too… Ever go to Tahoe?”

You see what I did there? I left a question INSIDE my friend request. For her to answer it, she’s going to feel compelled to add me.

It’s also just something people are looking to do. Let’s face it, we all measure our social success by how many people we’ve got as friends on Facebook. We all want a HUGE network, so women will WANT to add you – if only to increase their friend count.

STEP 3: Start leveraging the tools.

Facebook has a huge amount of potential for the guy who wants to take advantage of them. You can add all kinds of cute little applications to send virtual drinks to friends, send goofy gifts, or even start your own polls and surveys.

But one of the best tools you need to be using is the GROUP function on Facebook.

In fact, in preparing for this article, I created a group to start connecting you guys together and enabling men to share information.

You can do this, too. Just create a group based on your passion and your local area.

I’m going to advise you to avoid starting a group based on “Warcraft” or on the latest hot actress.

Make your group something a woman can relate to and might be interested in. Maybe it’s the television show “Lost…” or maybe it’s about all things Italian.

Ba-da-bing! Now you’ve got a hook to use to invite her into your group.

STEP 4: Start escalating and creating more opportunities.

Remember, this is a VIRTUAL tool. It’s online.

In other words, your connections don’t REALLY exist anywhere except on some server in an air-conditioned room in a data center somewhere.

It’s up to YOU to bring these connections to life with events that you can invite people to.

Most people will stroll around this virtual network, but then never take it into the REAL world. That’s where YOU come in.

Maybe once a month you should organize a happy hour at your local favorite bar. Or maybe you make a Facebook group for wine tasters, and then every other Friday you meet up and go tasting the latest Pinot Noirs.

THAT is your opportunity to start looking for romantic potential in the groups. You have to remember that you can’t be a Facebook “pickup artist” and try to attract women online.

You have to build a network, forge some connections, and meet women in person to start creating the attraction.

That being said, you can also send out some playful introductions to women you don’t know and see if they bite. (Just make sure your profile has enough interesting bait for them to nibble at…)

– Write on people’s walls…

– Send a few virtual drinks…

– Send some good karma…

– Use the “Flirtable” app…

For the man with initiative, the Facebook world is yours.

So step up and start creating the social network, then start meeting the women in it.
– Carlos Xuma

Filed Under: Meeting Women Online

Why Online Is The New Dating

February 18, 2013 By

Bryant Park, late Apr 2009 - 21Everything we do now takes place online, from work and study to catching up with friends, so why not try your hand at looking for your new partner here too?

The internet is a great place for catching up with old pals, connecting with work colleagues, shopping and even finding a new job. So if we are using the web for all these other aspects of our lives, why don’t more of us use it to find love?

Unfortunately, over the years online dating has developed a stigma of being something people only do in desperation. Fortunately however, this stigma is now on its way out, with new online dating sites available to help people meet likeminded individuals without feeling they need to hide anything.

Why go online?

So many people choose to go online to look for love, simply because they don’t get the chance to go out and meet people physically. Lots of individuals spend their days tied to the desks of their office jobs, interacting either over the phone, by email, or simply with the few people who happen to sit in the desks around them, with little or no prospect of striking up a meaningful conversation, let alone finding love.

The new online dating

Dating sites have now evolved beyond the simple picture and profile you used to find online, instead taking getting to know people to a whole new and actually more natural level. For example, some dating sites provide events that allow singletons to mingle together and meet in a natural environment and chat face to face. These events will be held in local areas or be open to people within a specific age range and allow you to meet your prospective partner in person rather than via email or a webcam.

This level of dating means things can go much more naturally between the two parties. You can sit, have a drink and have a chat, much the same way you would if you met in a bar or park.

However, there is one unique difference in this method, you are both fully aware of the other’s intentions – so there is no game playing or second guessing. Essentially, it allows for a much more candid approach to life and love.

If online dating is something you have considered, try taking the leap. It is much more natural and is easy to meet someone than you might once have thought.

About the Author:

Ella Woods is interested in dating and relationships and writes articles on online dating. www.singlesolution.com was one of the site she visited to look for dates.

Filed Under: Articles, Meeting Women Online

Enjoy Online Dating Success In 2013

February 11, 2013 By GetTheGirl

Catching up on e-mail...Plenty Of Fish

Single and looking for love? There really are plenty of fish in the sea.  Luckily the online dating pool makes it easier than ever to catch one. It’s not easy to meet people if you have a particularly busy lifestyle or don’t have the opportunity to get out as much as you’d like. There’s nothing wrong with that and that’s where online dating sites come in.

Profile Pictures

There are some obvious things that are an absolute must if you are serious about finding a date online. Uploading an image is non-negotiable. Without a picture you’ll struggle to get any responses at all. Studies show that profiles with pictures get up to eight times as many responses. There is still come negativity about online dating though with 69% of people believing that they’re unlikely to find love online.

Tell The Truth

It’s certainly true that users of online dating sites are much savvier than they used to be.  Most users for example can spot lies a mile off. You are far better off being yourself and being honest from the start. Ultimately you’re looking for a relationship so it needs to be built on trust. There really is no reason to lie about your income, job or anything else.

Find The Right Dating Website

Stick to one site. Often you’ll find the same profiles on many of the most popular dating sites so you’re really wasting your time by signing up for several sites. Focus your efforts on one and make sure you create a killer profile. Spend time on the site and interact meaningfully with other users. If eventually you find the sites not for you then delete your profile and sign up for an alternative site that better suits your needs. There are many niche sites about there from standard dating sites to niche dating. There are many comparison sites available to help you right the best dating site for you. Think about what it is you’re looking for and try to find the right site from the outset.

Be Unique

Even online dating sites are a competitive arena. Take a look at other profiles and avoid everything they do. You want to stand out some come up with a unique approach to set you apart from the rest. Everyone talks about their love of pets, travelling or eating out so avoid these topics. There has to me more interesting stuff for you to put on your profile than that right?

Be Upfront

It’s important to be upfront with that you are looking for. If you’re looking for a long term relationship then say so. If you’re looking for something more casual then it’s equally important to be upfront from the start. You’ll save yourself so much time and meet partners who are looking for the same thing as you. It can be disheartening to date people who don’t have the same goals as you and if that’s the case then maybe your profile could be the problem.

Ask For Help

It’s often a good idea to ask your friends to help you build your profile. They know you better than anyone and it can be hard to talk about yourself. You should try to keep your profile updated with new hobbies and interests and be sure that it reflects you accurately. Following these simple guidelines will hopefully get you on track to a successful online dating experience.

About The Author

Written by Sam Chapman owner of Top 10 Dating Reviews providing ratings and reviews of the best online dating sites. Follow Sam Chapman @Top10DatingUK.

Filed Under: Articles, Meeting Women Online

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