Relationship Advice for Men Archives - Page 2 of 6

How to Make Her Choose You in a Love Triangle

November 7, 2013 By GetTheGirl

It’s a secret that most guys would do anything for, but sadly, many men simply don’t have a clue on how to respond to competition and how to end up with that one girl everyone is after.

On the same note, it would be a lie to state that faithfully sticking to a couple of dating rules will guarantee you success. However, here are four things that will put you on the right track.

Work On Yourself Before Taking The Leap

Women are particularly picky about the guy that they date. They consider a lot of factors before settling on a guy, and one of these factors will be your personal outlook and how you carry yourself around.

If your wardrobe is full of the kinds of clothes that only your grandmother would complement, think again before putting them on for a date. Girls can tell a lot about men from the way they dress. Simple things such as mismatching the color of your belt with the shoes you have on may not mean much to you, but a girl may interpret that as a guy who is not keen on details. You’ll find that some brands are better than others, and although you may not be a fashion-forward guy, you can still amp up your wardrobe without changing your personality. You can experiment with accessories you might not be used to wearing like watches, hats, etc. These types of things will definitely help you stand out to her.

Be Persistent, Not Overbearing

There’s no shame in being brazen when you’re seeking the heart of a girl who is also in demand by other men. Be sure to show interest, and not just interest in her looks, but interest that goes beyond mere appearance. At the same time, you shouldn’t come off as needy. The last thing any beautiful girl wants is a guy who doesn’t have his own life. You can show this bravery by not being afraid to text her something that made you think of her, or ask her to come to your soccer game. Little things that show that she is on your mind will be the best way to ease her into the idea of dating you. Once you start talking more, and seeing each other more often, pretty soon you will be on her mind as well.

Show Your Confidence and Boldness

While it is normal for you to feel a bit intimidated, especially if the girl is super-hot, acting all shy and submissive will weaken everything that the girl might have felt for you. Don’t confuse confidence with cockiness, because the latter will definitely be a turnoff to most girls. You will exude confidence if you are comfortable around her, and she will pick up on any uncomfortable vibes. Most guys usually fail because of lack of confidence, but if you put aside your nerves, you will find that it is much easier to be around her, get to know her, and make her laugh. Make sure that you remain yourself—confidence might not be your strongest attribute, but if you can get comfortable enough around her to show her who you really are, you will find that confidence comes naturally.

Push Your Creativity To The Limit

It’s a fact, cute girls get hit on all the time, and if you are the kind of guy who uses pick-up lines, the chances that you win a girl’s heart are almost nil. Even though you may be pursuing her, try to be challenging and act hard-to-get in a fun way. Above all, don’t forget to be a gentleman. Listen to her keenly, be romantic when she least expects it, and use compliments sparingly. The minute she notices something different about you, it will make her want to know more. If you are just like every other guy that has ever hit on her, you won’t stand out.

Above all, remember that although you may need to put significant effort into winning a girl over, you shouldn’t have to do all the work. If the girl you are chasing is stringing you along just to get attention, but never returns your affections, she probably isn’t worth your time. Don’t burn yourself out on a girl that only wants attention—find that girl that wants YOUR attention!

5 Things That Get a Girl Peeved

October 26, 2013 By GetTheGirl

One of the best ways to get a girl and especially keep her, is avoiding what “peeves” her off! A peeve may not be bad enough to make her get up a leave, but over time it may be pushing her to the door – especially early on in a relationship! Here are 5 of the top pet peeves that really annoy women and should make every effort to avoid:

Calling or Texting Too Much

Showing your adoration for us is great, and we love knowing that you are thinking about us. However, a barrage of texts while we are at school, work, trying to sleep, or simply enjoy some “me time,” all those interruptions get annoying. If we’re sending you “ttyl” and “later babes” it probably is a huge hint to lay off.

Going MIA Gets you on the Couch

In all fairness to number one’s topic of calling or texting to much, it only makes sense to mention that your lady doesn’t appreciate it when you fail to call or return her messages or simply don’t call when you say you will. It’s possible to overdo it and stay on her good side, but going in MIA will get you in the doghouse fast!

Poor Shaving Habits

Getting creative with facial hair is all the rage, but guys, we ask you to keep what you have working well groomed. Stray hairs everywhere are itchy and scratchy on a woman’s tender face, so a solid shaving routine is advisable. Consider investing in a classic shave set in order to get a better shave, if you use the right equipment, shaving won’t be such a hassle. Don’t be tempted to go overboard with your new shaving equipment, because many women aren’t crazy about over-manscaping either.

Unexplained Texts and Calls

When you’re hanging out with your girl and your phone starts blowing up, don’t be coy when she finally asks who it is. Even if it really is your buddy Joe from work talking about the game, be forthcoming. She’ll find out one way or the other what the truth is, and it will keep her from driving you crazy meanwhile.

Put that Seat Down Boys!

It may be a such a minimal request that makes no sense to guys, but if it’s such a small request, why make a big deal out of doing it? Your girl will defnitely notice if you make the effort to get into the habit of putting the toilet seat down. You may not care, but girls definitely notice, so getting in this habit will definitely help you avoid nagging and arguments.

Overall gentlemen, avoid these five pet peeves that ladies have about men but seldom mention to anyone but their girlfriends, and you should stay in her good graces for a long time to come.

Four Tips For Recognizing An Unhealthy Relationship

October 23, 2013 By GetTheGirl

It’s been said that you never truly know a person until you’ve lived with them for a few years. Many relationships start out on seemingly good footing until, some time down the road, the bumps appear. Suddenly, you realize you partner is no longer who you fell in love with. These problems occur all of the time, which may explain why America’s divorce rate is at a staggering 60 percent, with an average marriage length of ten years or less. Fortunately, there are ways you can identify an unhealthy relationship and act before things get too out of hand.

Trust Issues

Trust is a key component of a healthy relationship. When your partner behaves suspiciously for no good reason, lies to you or invades your privacy, there is a problem with trust. This can take the form of interrogating you after going out with friends, skimming through your emails, browsing history and phone records and making baseless accusations. On the other hand, if your partner exhibits shifty behavior, has frequent unaccountable absences or appears to be hiding something, you have every right to be distrustful.

Controlling

Controlling behavior is often deeply rooted in insecurity and inevitably breeds problems. Even when people are in a relationship, they require some level of independence. If someone shows a desire to control who your friends are, how you dress, what you do online, where you work, how to spend your money or otherwise tells you what to do, it’s a big neon sign indicating an emotionally abusive relationship.

Problems With Anger

All couples fight and argue occasionally, but when someone gets angry frequently and at the drop of a hat, it’s something to be wary of. You can tell this is a problem when you constantly feel like you’re dreading the next outburst. You may even find yourself altering your opinions, habits and actions just to prevent conflicts. Anger issues are especially problematic because they’re often a prelude to physical abuse.

Threatening or Violent Behavior

Even if they’ve never acted on it, if your partner has made threats toward your life or safety, it’s critical that you end the relationship. Physical abuse doesn’t usually happen right away. Stay alert for signs of impending violence from your partner such as throwing or breaking items, grabbing or restraining you or using violent gestures meant to provoke fear.

No relationship is perfect, and they all have their hard times. However, for the sake of your own happiness and safety, you owe it to yourself to know when things in a relationship are unacceptable or dangerous.

True Commitment Phobia

September 8, 2013 By GetTheGirl

You Can Overcome Commitment Phobia and Enjoy Your Relationship!

Do you have commitment phobia?

Commitment phobia can be a serious issue when it comes to being in a relationship, but it is something that can be overcome.

We hear a lot about commitment phobia, but is it psychological or just an excuse? Well, it’s actually both. Some people actually have psychological issues when it comes to commitment. Others use it as a way to avoid commitment on their part, but continue to benefit from the commitment of someone else. In this article we will be discussing the psychological aspects of commitment phobia.

Simply stated, commitment phobia is the fear of committing. Some people may fear committing to decisions in general, while others may fear commitment to a relationship. There’s more than one reason why a person may fear relationship commitment. Some may find it difficult to give up their freedom, and others may fear getting too close due to past experiences.

Signs of Commitment Phobia

The signs are different for everyone. The way a person reacts depends on what type of commitment they fear, why they fear it, their personality, and how they respond. After reviewing a large amount of content identifying signs of commitment phobia, I found there to be a lot of inaccurate information out there.

Some of the most common ways commitment Phoebes react are by:

• Constantly whining or complaining.

• Creating an on again-off again relationship.

• Finding something wrong with anyone that they begin to fall for.

• Distancing themselves when things begin to get serious.

• Avoiding making plans.

Among the many signs that I read form various articles I found a few to generally be accurate. Here they are:

• Becomes emotionally detached.

• Continuously starts arguments over silly little things, and always blame it on you.

• Has a habit of making plans, changing them, or backing out of them at the last minute.

• Distant when it comes to talking about feelings or relationships.

• Doesn’t want you around their family and friends.

• Don’t like to talk about future plans with you.

• Have had several past relationships that were going good, and then suddenly they ended them.

• Say that they want to spend time with you, but then suddenly change their mind.

• Choose to date others with busy schedules or who live away.

• Unpredictable and unreliable in a relationship.

• Moody when it comes to relationship issues.

• Don’t like planning ahead.

• Get frustrated when you mess with or add to their personal things.

Other signs I found that could be true for some commitment phoebes but not others were:

• Doesn’t want to commit right away. (They may just need to get to know their partner first.)

• Takes a while to say “I loves you”. (Often is a good sign that they mean it when they do say it.)

• Moves a lot. (Could be due to financial issues, work, or other things unrelated.)

• Changes jobs often. (Could be moving up or searching for the right job.)

• Picky about who they date. (It pays to be a little picky.)

• Dates people who aren’t compatible. (It takes a while to determine who is compatible.)

• Has mood changes. (Could be due to other psychological issues.)

• Charming, and know how to get what they want. (Wow, I’m speechless.)

• Attractive and successful yet single. (Maybe that right person still hasn’t been found.)

• Unfaithful and not truthful. (Hmm, this sounds more like an excuse…)

• Play head games. (A lot of people play head games for a lot of different reasons.)

• Doesn’t want you at their home, but want to meet at your instead. (It sounds like they are hiding something.)

• Had several short relationships. (This may be due to bad luck, it depends on who ended the relationships and why.)

• Don’t have many processions. (Maybe they have a small place, lost everything, or don’t have much income.)

• Has a freelance careers or travels frequently for work. (Maybe this is just their ling of work, saying freelancers are commitment phoebes is like saying cats don’t have hair just because a few don’t.)

Getting Over It

Hypnotherapy is used successfully for many phobias, including relationship commitment.

In order to get over a commitment phobia a person must first recognize that they have it. Next the cause needs to be determined. Is it a fear of getting hurt due to past relationships, or past events that occurred during childhood? Is it a fear of decision making? Maybe it’s a fear of losing freedom? Once the cause is determined, the process of overcoming it can begin.

There are many options for overcoming a phobia including hypnotherapy and anchoring, but the best way to overcome it is through self-help techniques.

Journaling is a great way to gain a better understand of yourself. Write down uncomfortable situations, why they were uncomfortable, feelings they caused, reactions, and alternative reactions. Reflecting on past situations, feelings, and reactions is a great way to learn how to cope with and overcome certain feelings.

Moving on is an important step in overcoming fears resulting from past experiences. Pick the positive things that resulted from the experience and what was learned from the experience. Learn from the experience but don’t take it to the extreme. The same thing doesn’t happen every time. Let the past experiences can make a person stronger person, or they can make a person with fears. Choose to be the stronger person.

A good way to overcome a fear is to face it. Some fears have to be proven wrong. The only way to do that is to give things a chance. You will never know how something might have turned out if you never gave it a chance. Why continue traumatizing yourself because you fear you might get hurt. It’s not worth it if you are hurting yourself in the process.

Challenge negative thoughts. Could it really be that bad? What am I really afraid of? Why am I making myself miserable now to avoid making myself miserable? Maybe it won’t work out, but if it does it would be great!

The Partner’s Role

Having the right partner when trying to overcome a phobia is important because if they aren’t understanding they may make things worse. It is important that the partner:

• Not pressure.

• Give space and not smother.

• Demonstrate the positive aspects of commitment.

• Don’t give ultimatums.

• Is someone trustworthy and open.

• Is patient.

• Understands even a person who fears commitment still loves.

Conclusion

Kicking commitment phobia can ultimately reward you with getting the girl of your dreams!

Commitment phobia doesn’t mean “unable to love”. It means “fear to commit”. It’s a fear that can be overcome, and it should be. It isn’t something that occurs in only a certain group of people. It can happen to anyone. Some attractive successful single people may have it, but online free daters may too. It doesn’t matter if you are from Australia or Europe, it just depends on who they are as a person and their past.

Today’s article contribution comes from Paul Fredrick who works at Free Dating Sites Australia. See more of Paul’s tips and advices here: http://www.freedatingaustralia.com.au/brisbane-qld

How Phone Cards Can Save a Long Distance Relationship

August 16, 2013 By GetTheGirl

I have a good friend who met someone from another country. It was a completely by chance meeting, but within moments they hit it off. One of the biggest things they had in common upon their initial meeting was they were both learning English. Now, both of them already had a strong grasp of the language, but they were far from perfect, however, it was the only language between them they could use to successfully (well, mostly) communicated. For the sake of their privacy I won’t reveal exactly where they’re from, but I can tell you they lived worlds apart, one from Western Europe, the other East Asia.

Over the course of the few days after they hit it off, they ended up spending a considerable amount of time together. I’ll admit, I was a little jealous. I really wanted to spend time with one of my best friends before she headed home. We were all international students and we were all from “somewhere else.” But, I absolutely did not want to get in the way of a blossoming relationship. So, I didn’t and over the next two weeks their relationship grew.

Then, as these things happen, they had to go their separate ways. It was devastating to see both of them scrambling to come up with a way to delay the departure, to come up with a quick scheme to avoid the separation, but there was too little time and the inevitable arrived. My friend nearly missed her flight on the day of her departure, but through a few tears, they vowed to stay in touch, and they tried.

Today, most people are easily connected through the internet, they communicate by email or through social media and for many it’s very convenient. Unfortunately, there were circumstances at play that prevented this convenience many of has have grown accustomed to and now take for granted. So, they had to keep in touch the old fashioned way. By phone (but not the old, old fashioned way, letter writing). My friend quickly learned and complained to me she could no longer afford to continue to stay in communication with the person she’d seemingly completely fallen for.

It wasn’t surprising. Making phone calls over such great distances can be one of the most ridiculously expensive ways to communicate. I had to navigate it and figure it out during my first year as an international student, and to the uninitiated it was nothing short of a nightmare in terms of the bill I was racking up simply talking to my mother in the mornings. This was my friend’s first experience with what you might call “international love.” She’d no doubt blush and tell me to hush out of embarrassment, but she isn’t’ here at the moment, so it’s ok. Anyway, I imparted the knowledge I had learned over the course of my first year abroad. Because of the internet, many people don’t think to look into calling cards as a way to stay in touch and keep costs low. They assume that because international calling is so expensive, they should be avoided.

Calling cards have brought telephone communication around the world a simple process.

In the past, this was generally true, but due to the highly competitive nature of the industry, as I’ve learned, costs have dropped enough to make it practical. My friend was out of touch with her burgeoning love interest for nearly a month before she was able to get back in touch thanks to phone cards and let me tell you, she had panic attacks, afraid she’d assume the lack of communication meant she was no longer interested. Luckily, they were able to develop their relationship further, and unlike many long distance relationships, they stayed together, yet apart. Eventually, these two were brought back together and I’ve watched, not as jealous as I once was, as they spend every waking moment and many a-sleeping moment together. They’ll have to go their separate ways again soon, however, but I know, just as much as they know, they’ll be able to keep in touch (and still afford to go to school!), and have a very bright, love-filed future.

Post Script: While they’ve had success using phone cards, there are a few things to keep in mind. First, not all calling cards are created equal. Since it’s such a competitive industry, many unsavory individuals and companies have sprung up to take advantage. If you can, do research on a calling card or service before purchasing it. This is where the internet can be your best friend, since you can search for the card and find user experiences and reviews. Luckily, my friend had me in the place of the internet to do the research for her and make a recommendation, so if you know someone who communicates internationally and makes phone calls, hit them up for information!

Andrei Milosevic is an international student, traveler, and writer. Over the past few years, he has been studying international business and providing advice and insight into international calling. In his free time he kayaks and Skypes with his best friend back home in Serbia.